The lonesome writer

Bad infinity joke library (1 entry)

27 posts in this topic

Foxtrot ranger motto

"senpai never notices me."

feel free to subsitute you're own stealth unit for this joke

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I thought it was just good manners and hygiene to wash your hands after going to the bathroom no matter if you got anything on your hands?

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Bah...The Rasyat should of shot them both for the impudence of simply speaking in the presence of a Morat. 

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19 hours ago, The lonesome writer said:

Foxtrot ranger motto

"senpai never notices me."

"Until it's too late.":evil::_skull__rvmp_by_bad_blood::evil:

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4 hours ago, DaRedOne said:

I like this topic! Let's not let it die. Here's a silly joke adapted to Infinity:

So, after a very hard, complicated and dramatic turn of events, a historic gathering of minds and diplomats was held. This included even representatives from the Combined Army! It was amazing, and many discussions were held in a historic attempt to create peace, or some semblance of, in the human sphere. After much deliberation and discussion, there was a pause, and some time to rest.

By sheer coincidence, a Rasyat Diplomatic Officer, a Tohaa Diplomatic Delegate and an Aleph Magister went to the same restroom. After doing his business, the Diplomatic delegate washed his hands thoroughly, scrubbing well and keeping it clean and pristine. Once he was done, he said "ALEPH has taught us to use our resources to their maximum capacity, always producing perfect, impeccable results." feeling all smug.

Then the Tohaa diplomat finally walked to the sink, washed his hands quickly and with no fuzz "We of the Tohaa Triumvirate optimize our resources to avoind unnecessary expenditure" he said as he dried his hands up using a single towel, looking clean and shiny too.

Then the Rasyat just up and made his way to the door, not even casting a look at his peers. "I knew morats didn't wash their hands" said the Delegate. "What a savage" said the magister. Then the Rasyat stopped, turned around and said "We of the Morat don't piss on our hands"

Fantastic

55 minutes ago, Golem2God said:

"Until it's too late.":evil::_skull__rvmp_by_bad_blood::evil:

Exactly :D

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19 hours ago, DaRedOne said:

I like this topic! Let's not let it die. Here's a silly joke adapted to Infinity:

So, after a very hard, complicated and dramatic turn of events, a historic gathering of minds and diplomats was held. This included even representatives from the Combined Army! It was amazing, and many discussions were held in a historic attempt to create peace, or some semblance of, in the human sphere. After much deliberation and discussion, there was a pause, and some time to rest.

By sheer coincidence, a Rasyat Diplomatic Officer, a Tohaa Diplomatic Delegate and an Aleph Magister went to the same restroom. After doing his business, the Diplomatic delegate washed his hands thoroughly, scrubbing well and keeping it clean and pristine. Once he was done, he said "ALEPH has taught us to use our resources to their maximum capacity, always producing perfect, impeccable results." feeling all smug.

Then the Tohaa diplomat finally walked to the sink, washed his hands quickly and with no fuzz "We of the Tohaa Triumvirate optimize our resources to avoind unnecessary expenditure" he said as he dried his hands up using a single towel, looking clean and shiny too.

Then the Rasyat just up and made his way to the door, not even casting a look at his peers. "I knew morats didn't wash their hands" said the Delegate. "What a savage" said the magister. Then the Rasyat stopped, turned around and said "We of the Morat don't piss on our hands"

Wait we should add someone who walks up and goes "they taught us it is a common curtesy to always wash our hands"

and then another "they taught us to only steal from those with dirty hands" they hold up a wallet.

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Okay, here's another silly one:

Back in Rodina, a lineman is eating his grub, and it tastes horrible:

"Sir, this food tastes like dirt" He complains to the veteran Kazak next to him

"So what, Comrade? Aren't you here to serve the motherland?" the veteran answers with a brisk tone

"Yes, sir. To serve her, not to eat her."

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23 minutes ago, DaRedOne said:

Okay, here's another silly one:

Back in Rodina, a lineman is eating his grub, and it tastes horrible:

"Sir, this food tastes like dirt" He complains to the veteran Kazak next to him

"So what, Comrade? Aren't you here to serve the motherland?" the veteran answers with a brisk tone

"Yes, sir. To serve her, not to eat her."

Sorry it's kinda meh

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Heh, can't win them all B)

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33 minutes ago, The lonesome writer said:

Sorry it's kinda meh

Well, it's a bad joke library, after all. 

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1 hour ago, Barrogh said:

Well, it's a bad joke library, after all. 

yeah but bad jokes at least make sense.

And in regards to the other joke that was submitted I kinda don't like the idea of just ripping off other people's jokes and shoe horning infinity in. It's not really an inifinity joke then it's just a joke

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4 hours ago, The lonesome writer said:

yeah but bad jokes at least make sense.

If it helps, imagine the conversation in Polandball where "land" or "people" is replaced with "clay"

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4 hours ago, Mahtamori said:

If it helps, imagine the conversation in Polandball where "land" or "people" is replaced with "clay"

That makes even less sense

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Yo' mama so ugly she should always declare change face.

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15 minutes ago, Momo234 said:

Yo' mama so ugly she should always declare change face.

That's so stupid and stupidly clever. It makes me feel very hypocritical to every other response I have given so far.

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"How to act like a human for dummies", distributed in the Aleph training rooms.

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2 hours ago, Wyrmnax said:

"How to act like a human for dummies", distributed in the Aleph training rooms.

That's fantastic I'll try to remember to add it to the original post later today

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1 hour ago, Pierzasty said:

What do you call a Specialist Sergeant with a huge mold line across his buttocks?

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 A bad ass MO FO.

 

It's funny in a way but I don't think I understand the word play

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the "bad ass" is the mold line, as in a bad casting.

MO = military orders (the sectorial the unit comes from)

FO = forward observer (most commonly taken specialist sergeant profile is the forward observer)

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15 minutes ago, DUCK said:

the "bad ass" is the mold line, as in a bad casting.

MO = military orders (the sectorial the unit comes from)

FO = forward observer (most commonly taken specialist sergeant profile is the forward observer)

Ah I'm new so I didn't think of that :D but it's pretty good

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On 8/10/2017 at 7:57 PM, Pierzasty said:

What do you call a Specialist Sergeant with a huge mold line across his buttocks?

  Reveal hidden contents

 A bad ass MO FO.

 

Boo. I mean, funny. But boo.

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A group of Highlanders attacks Jeanne d'Arc, who wins?

Spoiler

England.

 

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